Time After Time

A couple days ago, I found--tucked away neatly in my SPAM folder--a shiny, new rejection email.

Of the glorious negatives that I've thus far received, this one hit a particular soft spot and reminded me: Be careful what you wish for.

Aside: Over the past weeks of searching for someone to buy my beloved first novel, I have acquired roughly four "No" emails (Is it sad that I have already lost count?). Each one--up until the last--felt like a generic, non-answer from some computer somewhere that never even read my entry. At one point, I even grumbled to Love at the uselessness of the replies. I wanted wholeheartedly for someone to not just say "We don't have time for you" but maybe "this specifically doesn't work" (and if they're feeling particularly nice maybe add "and here's why"). You know, make me believe that a human pair of eyes read the twenty requested pages!

I realize that any given agent's job is far too hectic to really give any discernible amount of critique to those not under their bill and that I'm writing to a higher level of the literary food chain, not my writing buddy a few states over. But--in my defense--if you think it's crap, tell me. I'd rather know right this moment that I have no possibility of getting my hole-punched manuscript into a publisher's hands than to trudge along for years and years, wasting time in the thought that someone, someday will tell me "Yes".

You might say that it's also not their job to know whether or not a story will see the light of day, but I say rubbish. That--in my pov--is a huge part of their job. I firmly believe that agents across the World receive piles of really bad crap every day; items that they read and just CRINGE at: A theory that leads me to believe that what I'm sitting on is at the very least a mediocore endeavor.

I should be encouraged that my letters don't say "You should probably look into a different career choice".

Maybe that's saying something. End of Aside.

To get back to my story--the newest "No, thank you" letter actually had some human wording to it with the agent saying that she wanted to get into the book (she read the prologue and chapter one), but it didn't happen. And, she said that with her packed schedule of authors, she couldn't devote the time to me to make it jump out at her.

This rejection has a somewhat different taste in my mouth. It's uplifting to the point that she at least thinks it has potential (otherwise I have no doubt she would've said so). It also tells me that my query writing is on track (i.e., even if the two chapters she read didn't quite fit the bill, the query at least intrigued her).

The downer is that it begs the response for me to muddle through and recheck the entire project, maybe construct an alternate opening. Although I'll do what needs to be done, I've been majorly procrastinating (partially because I got into another book in the Patterson series, partially because I've been busy with LIFE, and partially because I have other writing projects that are either more pressing or more interesting).

So, for now, I'll buckle down and spend the next week doing an overhaul of sorts to make sure it really is as pristine as I can make it. Because, even though I'd rather work on the fun sequel, there won't be one if I can't get the first one of the ground.

Sometimes the truth hurts.


*Kayla*